Last week was very eventful for me. After a weekend of venting to my very close friend about my feelings of anxiety caused by my job, as well as the growing sadness I felt inside; once again I slept in my bed unsure. I have always suffered from depression, but it’s something I’ve learned to push aside, or hide. However, with moving back home and getting a new job, it seemed like the little demon had creeped back into my life. To put some perspective, in Lubbock I had been doing so wonderful. I lost a ton of weight, got into a healthy workout regimine, and finished my album. It would seem, however, that moving back to Dallas would change all of that (though in my mind I had made a seamless transition) for the worse.
Last Monday, I decided that my depression and suicidal thoughts were not something I needed to keep to myself anymore because I couldn’t be trusted. I walked into my job and quit. Which instantly, was a burden from my shoulder. Then, I called my mom and told her everything and THAT, was an even greater burden off my shoulder. We decided that I needed a break to figure out my purpose in life and what about myself I wasn’t satisfied with. In that week of nothingness, I spent most of my time crying... equal parts eating BAD... equal parts panicking... then acceptance came. Understanding that life isn’t just motions. That happiness is something I’m going to have to figure out during the process of several journies. Which brings us to now.
As I mentioned earlier, I had a good amount of weight lost. After moving back home, I’d been working out on and off, but eating bad. Luckily I only managed to gain a little over ten pounds of the forty I’d lost. My favorite fitness and Lifestyle gal Tameika G has recently established an 80% vegan diet after going completely vegan for a month. The way she described the Change, I wanted in. Now, of course I didn’t fully commit and was still enjoying oxtails and rice and stew lol. However after having this new sense of belonging in this world, I was feeling like I should honestly go for it. My friend Told me about a girl he had recently gotten acquainted with, who had lost 60 pounds from going vegan. Yea, I was sold. I decided to go cold turkey and do a 90 day vegan diet, along with wellness and self-Love. My friend Tracy told me to record the process so here I am. Fail or Prevail it will all be recorded here and on my tumblr (aboveignorance.tumblr.com) and you will all see what happens. I also spent $230 Worth of groceries to meal prep and have vegan snacks in handy. So
Had a job interview in the morning so my breakfast was dry wheat, grain and quinoa cereal with Brazil nuts and organic unsweetened cranberry juice. Then when I got home. Prep began. By the time I finished it was pushing 5pm so I added my lunch and dinner together since I planned to work out after this post. However I did portion everything out for the week in containers, and breakfast will be the only meal that will vary/ and that I’ll cook everyday for week one. I’m so full of energy and it’s so strange to me that I’m full but not sleepy. I’m so used to being tired after a big/good meal, but instead I’m wide awake. I’m also battling a cold and my body is still energized, so that goes to show you, it’s not a joke. I also bought a book called THE HOW NOT TO DIE COOKBOOK by Dr. Gregor and that has helped with educating me on micros and macros. I got inspiration for the recipes (cauliflower curry, spinach artichoke, etc) though I did not follow them at all lol. I moreso just made it my own way but the book helped me know what to make(so basically the book made me crave food so I made what I was craving). I’m already very knowledgeable about cooking so if you aren’t, I’d suggest actually following the recipes. But here is my food for week one, it’s delicious!
So For Lunch roasted organic squash with a jalapeño eggplant stir fry/dip, with gluten free, meatless ground beef topped with organic tomatoes and avocado. Then I have organic sweet potatoes in a light cinnamon berry blend.
For Dinner this week is sautéed chickpea quinoa balls soaked in organic cauliflower madras curry served over whole grain quinoa. Then, spinach artichoke dip with almond butter and almond cheese. And those are 3-grain crackers, they’re sooo good.
And then I decided to make a lemon berry mint green tea sweetened with friendly honey 😊 so these are my meals for the week, my breakfast will vary I’ll post those tomorrow. I didnt have any cravings today but I am extremely full and have tons of energy so Off to the gym! See you tomorrow!